On Friday night the perfect storm of work that is presently engulfing me abated for a moment and P and I went to see Cirque De Soleil as guests of a particularly generous client. We followed that with some Italian food and a little wine and staggered home, waxen-faced with tiredness.

I climbed straight into bed and P sat awhile at her PC before creeping up the stairs. “Are you awake?” she whispered. I was, barely, so I lay doggo for fear she might be about to ask me about what colour the curtains in the new house should be or something else I’m ill-equipped to deal with at the best of times.

Cautiously she edged into the darkened  bedroom. My eyes sprang open as I heard a sound that could only really be P crushing my glasses under her heel. “Oh CRAP!” she whispered. She waited to see if I had woken, scooped the bits into her hand and headed for the bathroom with the debris in order to examine the damage. There she was apparently overwhelmed with remorse as I could hear distinctly saying:

“Ha ha I never liked them anyway”.

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21 thoughts on “”

  1. I think I’m turning into my granny, as my kneejerk response to this was to say, ‘well, what on earth were they doing on the floor?’ I’m sure that will come back to bite me on the arse when, on my way to the loo in the middle of the night, I fall over the pile of books on the floor by my bed yet AGAIN.

    (Hope you’re not too blind without them 😉 )

  2. Yeah, I’m long overdue for a trip to the optometrist. Aside from the fact that I can’t see worth a damn in these specs, my glasses are lopsided from the wee lassie who just doesnt understand the meaning of “be gentle with Mommy’s glasses.”

  3. Hev – It should certainly make escape harder
    Kat – luckily I have ONE pair of disposable contacts left
    OTJ – She would never wake me to talk about Information Technology. I talk about it in my sleep apparently.
    CC – Photos!
    Paige – I think opticians and babies have entered an evil pact
    Meva – I could use some Queer Eye style assistance as the only colour I like is blue.

  4. Thatta Girl P…

    What did you think of the Canadian talent????

    I absolutely love the Cirque…
    My daughter looooooved the horse show that they had…

    Very generous clients indeed!!!!!

  5. I love P. I’m sorry, but that made me laugh out loud. And now my dad and my brother are both looking at me like I’m a nut.
    Heh.

  6. Yeah, I’m with Katja, I wondered what they were doing on the floor. Also, I loved P’s response, I would have said the same (if I hadn’t liked the glasses).

  7. I don’t know why readers here are rushing to the conclusion that P was sneaking on the floor, as opposed to atop the dressers, bureaus and nightstands as many stealthy spouses are wont to do. Please do post a pic of the new specs when they arrive.

  8. Cranky – she’s got little monkey feet. She uses them to open jars of penaut butter while watching the telly.

    Pend – I really loved it. I think I am going to do a blogbite about it.

    Mel – Growl at them and make high pitched whooping noises. I guarantee they will stop looking at you.

    MM – Crikey – I hadn’t thought of that. No doubt there is a compensation claim coming my way.

    YD- COme to think of it that would explain the leathery wings

    Pog – See – the central heating has improved your mood. You are thawing.

    OGM – I do have ocntacts but last time I wore them I got a corneal ulcer. That was fun. So I wish God would at least try to make sure his signs aren’t mutually contradictory.

    Em – Trust you and Katja to gang up on me.

    Cronz – I have the camera ready. Anyone have suggestions? Horn RIms? Dame Edna?

    CtW – I have nightmares about the apir of you going for a beer together.

  9. I think it’s all part of a larger scheme. Without your specs it won’t matter what kind of curtains she gets if you can’t see them. She’s a genius. Too bad my hubbie has perfect eyesight.

  10. I placed my brand-new glasses carefully atop the toilet seat while I got in the bath once. I read my book in the bath for a while, and then when I got out, I needed to sit down somewhere to dry between my toes…..
    It was like the opening scene from Four Weddings and A funeral after that…..

    I’m glad its not just me!

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