Careful observation of our cat has revealed the following:

(1) Places our cat likes to have a pee

(a) The flower bed, nestled amongst the bulbs he has rooted up;

(b) On the duvet;

(c) In my work bag;

(d) In the bath;

(e) In the shoe cupboard;

(2) Places our cat does not like to take a pee

(a) The Deluxe Cat-shit-o-tron 2000 single storey detached cat lavatory with non-allergenic, organic, biodegradable, “EZE-arse” (TM), bottom-friendly litter that we bought for him.

Pack your cat toys in a tiny handkerchief, tie it to a stick and on your way Mr Catty and don’t think that that insolent look is going to melt my heart.

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