Having walked around a grey world in a black mood for longer than is decent, I found myself listening to Johnny Cash’s plangent version of Trent Reznor’s “hurt”. In it he asks the question “what have I become?” At the moment I heard the words I thought, self-piteously, “can there be any more frightening question than that?”Â
Surely, it occurred to me, there must be: “where did we put the fire extinguisher”, “should the plane’s engine be making that noise”, “do you mind if we spend Christmas with mother again this year”?
What is the most frightening question you have been asked?
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Ha!
I’d have to say it was “Would you like to go play frisbee some time?” by a gray-haired man that was my father’s age – and was 6’7″ tall. (That’s 2m tall for you, Moobsie!)
I’d taken a 2 hour community arts class with him on voice acting. He had a very distinctive voice. A week later, I was at work when I answered our phones and someone that sounded very much like him was on the other line. I ended up asking if the man had taken that class, and he said yes. He remembered me. Then he said that he’d thought “we’d had a connection” and proceeded to ask me out! I said no, so then he asked if I’d like to play frisbee some time! He insisted that it would just be a friendly activity. Um, YEAH. Go find some friends your own age, buddy!
I’ve had to mull this one over. There are a few contenders- the consent forms I’ve been asked to sign whilst being rushed down a corridor on a gurney, there’s being asked if there is a history of asthma in my family whilst my little boy struggles for breath.
The winner is “are you sitting down?” because that has been followed by news of death, birth, serious illness, tragedy and heartbreak.
It always brings me out in a cold sweat.
“Is this Mrs. H? Your husband (the cop) was in an accident.”
He was ok, but I was 8 months pregnant with child number two and didn’t need that at midnight.
Hang in there, Moobs and Penny. *big hug*
“Excuse me, miss. Did you know that the back hem of your skirt is stuck in your waistband?”
Most frightening??
“What do you think of living with my mom?”
I almost fainted.
“Can you go and see the head(teacher)?”
You only got asked that if you were in trouble (I was a goody goody) or if there was really terrible news…
My daughter… she was five going on six when I was divorcing her father. She, in her desperation to keep us together said, “Will you please work it out with Daddy? Will you do it for me?” The only answer was no. And yet I had no idea how to make her understand.
LB- shudder
Wenchie – That is terrifying. Did they come to the door or phone?
Minks – I’ve had the sitting down thing. Presumably it is to deal with the possibility of fainting but I’ve never actually seen anyone faint – perhaps it was a by-product of stays and corsets.
Joz – lol. Just how far had you got before someone pointed this out to you?
CC – ARRRRGGGGHHHHH
Bec – I was far too swotty to have darkened the headteacher’s door. He generally tried to stay as removed as he could do from the affairs of the school. He just sat at a bog desk writing articles about Shakespeare.
Catherine – that must have been utterly heart-breaking.
Phew, a post of yours that I can read and not cry. I’m still covered in snot from the last one mind you.
Can’t think of a frightening question right now but not surprised that this is inspired by Johnny Cash. Babyfather plays one of his albums a lot and there is at least one song in which everyone dies. Grim.
‘Do you take this man, etc. etc.?’
oh goodness. as i’m only wee, i’ve not had many scary questions. the questions i asked which i now wish i never had ‘you still love me though, don’t you?’
the answer was ‘no’ and i wish i’d never asked
You want to call off the wedding??
Said to me by my ex. I did call it off. Then married my now husband. And I’m glad I did…..but BOY was that hard!
“Do you want a divorce?”
And I’ll second, third or whatever the “Are you sitting down?”
“What will you do if the tests show that the baby in utero has downs or another trisomy disorder?”
“Your blood is too thin to go through your abdominal wall and we need to do this soon. So, do you mind if we go through your neck, then through your heart?”
This has made me think hard. Oddly enough, some of the questions which should have instilled fear in my heart, were not, at the time, that frightening. Its amazing what the body and the mind can cope with when it needs to. When the Doctor asked me if I understood that the reason I couldn’t stand up any more was because the severe dehydration I was experiencing had started to cause organ failure, I just said “Oh, OK.” I somehow took it all in my stride. I wasn’t scared.
The scariest question I was ever asked was: “Can you see us being together for another 40 years?” The thought of this chilled me to the bone. I’d rather have had the organ failure if truth be told. That scary moment was worth it, though – because it got me thinking honestly about my situation. I realised then that my decision to leave him was going to be the best one I’d ever made. And it was.
“Mommy what does it mean when the toilet spits water for a long time?”
How long you ask….at least ten minutes before she thought to get us. We had toilet water on the kitchen table that time.
I’m so glad you’re back, sweets! And the most frightening question I’ve ever been asked is by my twin daughters who asked me recently why I didn’t “stay” with their dad?… Enough to water the eyes and run the nose.
Johnny Cash is SUCH a good musical choice for a black mood time.
You take all the time and listen to all the JC you need. (Johnny – not Jesus)
I was going to add, perhaps you shouldn’t listen to that song, well, not too much anyway. It’s REALLY depressing.
To be facetious, I suppose that question in job interviews where they ask, “Where do you see yourself in five years?” to which you inwardly groan and think, I hope to God I won’t still be here if I get the job, while you answer, “I’d hope to be a key player/integral member of the team/professional arse kisser by then,” and give them your broadest smile.
“Can I have an big roll of paper towels?” Immediately followed by, “Is leather expensive?”
“Why would I want to play frisbee with you?”
A galpal of mine was at a public pool with me. And she jumped into the water in her bikini.
She comes out and screams that she for got that she was wearing mascara and was the mascara running?
And meanwhile, yeah the mascara was running, but her top also came undone and she had not noticed…
I can’t come up with anything clever, but my husband suggested, “Is it in yet?” Not referring to himself, of course. Or me.
terrific question and responses. i think i have two:
1. do you want to consider an abortion (no)
2. where is M? that one time we couldn’t find her (briefly)
“When is it that you think this company will make money?” my accountant said looking over his half glasses.
Sigh!
How’s the marathon training going? You have inspired me and mine to run a Turkey trot at Thanksgiving (US, end of Nov) and a 1/2 marathon next year.
Much love to you both!
‘Did you really think that was chicken?’
‘Are you ready to face them in court?’
Brown trousers time.