Whilst we were in Singapore, lovely friends took us to see Keane whose earnest sixth-form blandness did not entirely distract me from my concern about whether the immodium was going to last through to the end of their fourth encore.

For me, the highlight came before Keane had even arrived on stage. A French band, whose name I did not catch, but whose lyrics included the oddly familiar: “Who do you think you are? Some kind of superstar?”, chugged to the end of their set leaving time enough for the dangly-haired lead singer to rap with us.

“Thanks to the HARD RAWWWK CAFE for all they have done for us! Yeah! We are doing a show tomorrow for CHARITY. Thank you thank you! It is for the … er …. er …. something money fund … er … well I know it’s for the kids!”

This set a benchmark for contrived sincerity that Keane strove to top:

Keane: “I wrote this next song because it reflects my belief that we should always look for the good in humanity. And do you know what? When I look out tonight, I see really good humanity”.

Anonymous Blogger in crowd: “You suck!”