Because I have a commendable curiosity about the world around me, I have drawn up a short questionnaire which you are obliged by Law (1) to answer. Feel free to answer on your own website and leave a link in comments. Answering the questions may help you learn a little about yourself, but I seriously doubt it. It will, however, allow me to satisfy my irrepressible beakiness.
(1) Why didn’t you think to say that at the time?
Ten minutes later you had the perfect comeback. What was it you should have said? Exact words please.
(2) A Damn Good Hiding
Have you ever hidden anything under your mattress? If so, what?
(3) Guilt Trip
Have you ever felt guilty about something for more than a year? If so, what?
(4) Mother Knows Best
Name one thing you kept secret from your mother.
(5) Missed Opportunities
Is there someone from your past who, you now wonder, might have been your great missed love? If so, what are they doing now?
(6) Poetry Please
What is the first line of the last poem you wrote?
Moobs
(1) The International Disclosure of Personal Information (Internet and Electronic Communications) (Consolidation) Regulations 2004 SI 2004 No: 5790, Regulation 5(6) and Sch 1, Chp 5, Part II Paras 13 and 43
Since my answers to the first five questions all relate to wanking, I am now going to write a poem about it.
Bloody hell Heather – I’m now going back to re-read all the comments I’ve made to your blog.
menace – I think that may be telling me more about my subconscious than your past.
ONE thing I kept secret from my mother? Just one?? Okay – 1986.
lmao i love you
1. Yes, you’re the biggest ass I’ve ever met. And you also have the biggest ass I’ve ever seen.
2. Hmmm… Sour watermelon candies.
3. Yes. But I won’t say what.
4. That I did not have sex at home when I was in High school. But she did know I was having sex, so I don’t know it that one even works.
5. Kermit the Frog. We had a real thing going on when I was 2.
6. I’ve never written one. I suck at poetry.
DAMN you Moobs! I have way too much to get done and now must do this BY LAW!! 🙂 Will do this later tonight…which is tomorrow where you are…
Goddangit. Tagged!
But, yum, these are some spicy questions. I may have to answer them…I will work on it…
Ooh, these are good ones. Answers here …
OKay, dusted… You made me think damn you. See here
Darn sneaky of you. Here’s your reply.
I think you should answer your own questions. I’ve answered them on my blog now.
Melissa – I know what you mean about Kermit: so masterful
Kim: I love you more than you love me. So there
M.o.t.r: I outsource that kind of work myself.
Jen: Good good, I will hold of proceedings in the meanwhile
Katja: Your answer to 1 is perfect
Bec and Brolo – thanks for playing. Your answers have been entered into my enormous database of evil.
Gamba: As soon as I thin you could deal with the answers I’ll post ’em. (rubs scaly hands together evilly)
I’m at work and can’t access my blog, so here come your answers:
1: “Yes, I know who you are. And that’s exactly why I’m being an arse.”
2: Nothing under my matress, although under my bed I have managed to accumulate 10 years worth of old FHMs. Probably worth a bundle on eBay…
3: Nope, I try and avoid negative emotions.
4: Just how extensively I experimented with drugs at college.
5: An ex-girlfriend who has now sadly passed away. I never gave us a chance and dwelled on it for years.
6: I have no idea, so I’ll give you this instead: when I was 14 my class was charged with writing a poem about a god or goddess. Despite worrying both my parents and my teacher, mine was held up as the best of the bunch and begun thus – “I am the god of Suicide, my name is Fall.”
Damn it! I forgot about this…I’m pretending not to be here. Moobs, I didn’t read your post….I haven’t been here for a while… I’m away right now on business. yeah, that’s it.
I’ll show you mine… (http://www.londonmama.squarespace.com/journal/2006/6/5/day-152-2006-moobs-meme.html)
but its cheating if you don’t show me yours!
here’s mine mooby moobs
Was just about to leave the answers on my blog, when I realised that said blog is read by each person mentioned in the answers. Could turn out disasterously. What with my mum seeing question four, and you reading question 5, it would just be too humiliating!
I’m not very interesting, but anyway:
(1) This has happened a few times, but I can’t remember any examples.
(2) There wouldn’t be much point – that’s about the worst hiding place around.
(3) Only about things where friends have suffered due to my actions – e.g. a friend was punched by a nutter (who was being held back by 3 people at the time) because of something stupid I’d said to another friend (the thing I said too).
(4) There are so many! The time me and some friends went out all night and slept in the entrance to a supermarket when I was about 13/14.
(5) No
(6) I’m not that creative.
“Missed me! Missed me! Now you gotta kiss…. Kevin.”
I’d love to participate, but I’m not sure I need numbers 4 & 5 out there on the Internet. And #1? Well, I always have just the perfect comeback, so afterthoughts not an issue for me. Uh, yeah, right!
It’s been fun reading everyone’s responses!
DAMN IT! I FUCKING FORGOT AGAIN! okay…i’m going to go bathe the neighbors cat, eat some dirt and smack Christina…I’ll be right back.
Moobs, my answers are on my own, very poorly blog. I’m able to post a comment on your blog, because you’re not on 20six. My blog is infected. Make sure you wash your hands after! xx
OOooo I like it rough. Do it again, but put the cat down first.
i’m all scratched up, missing tufts of hair and still bleeding from the neighbor’s cat. and Christina beat the living shit out of me…when I recover…I’ll do this tag thing. Okay?
Wasn’t the restraining order enough, Kev? Do you have to tell EVERYONE?!?
Wasn’t there a song about pussy control awhile back? ~giggling~ Ahem.
(1) Why didn’t you think to say that at the time?
Your mom. (Oh wait, that’s ALL I can ever think of. I’m so f*cking uncreative sometimes.)
(2) A Damn Good Hiding
Nothing under my mattress but I used to collect candy bars behind the books on my bookshelf so that my brother couldn’t find them.
(3) Guilt Trip
Never been guilty about anything. Ever. I am a saint in Banana’s clothing.
(4) Mother Knows Best
I don’t think my mother knows when I first starting knocking boots. (And she never needs to!)
(5) Missed Opportunities
I’m pretty sure that everyone I’ve dated th in the past has come and then gone for a good reason.
(6) Poetry Please
I don’t. do. poetry. Well, I did write a haiku about my condiment preferenceon hot dogs on Sarcomical’s site last month, I suppose that counts? So I think the first line was something about, oh, I don’t know. Something 5 syllables long.
Nice work LB. Going to go look for Sarcomical’s site now. Chris and Kevin. No hair-pulling. You know it is only goiing to end in tears.